Monday, December 7, 2009

The Spouse Hunt

I grew up with the mentality of looking at anyone who even thought to get married before securing a job as completely ridicules and irresponsible. I have reached a point of freedom. I could now move on because I am that responsible girl with a job. I could get married and move forward and not have to worry about anything because I have reached that point of complete clarity and security that I am free to just do about anything. O wait, one second, yes I was completely wrong.

I am more confused about life than I have ever been, at the same time I have never been as secure with myself as I am right now.

Lets face it: dating sucks. I can't just meet a guy fall in love, get married, and live happily ever after. You know why? because I first need to know so many things before I even go on a date with him. I have to know what type of kippa he wears, how often he davens, where he davens, how often he learns, what he learns, where he is from, where he went to school, where he went to yeshiva for the year or hopefully two, otherwise why give him a chance? (I hope you're catching the sarcasm.) Here's what I don't have to know until the date: How he treats a girl, if he is kind, respectful, caring, mature, sensitive. Why would I ask these things before I go on a date? Why do these things get forgotten when we are looking for a potential spouse? I just can't seem to get it. Don't get me wrong, religious observance is very important to me, but I feel like we just keep forgetting we are looking for a person not a piece of paper. I will be the first to admit that I am a hypocrite. I just wish there was less pressure on this whole dating scene.

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